‘Alien‘ is great. ‘Predator‘ is great. Both established great monsters with great universes that both eventually went on to not be as good. A crossover was hinted in ‘Predator 2‘, and seems like a very logical thing to do. It sounds great. If only it turned out that way…
Alien vs. Predator (2004)
So according to this movie, the Predators have been using Aliens for years to train their youngsters to be fearsome killers. A team of scientists discover a pyramid under the Antarctic ice which just so happens to be the setting for one of these trials. Long story short, Aliens fight Predators, humans get killed by both groups and there’s a lot of action and very little scares. The human characters fare the worst in this movie. None of them are interesting or all that likable and I don’t care in the slightest when they are horribly killed. In fact it comes as kind of a relief. Sanaa Lathan plays Alexa, the main character who is so far up her own backside she actually seems more like an antagonist sometimes. Lance Henriksen returns to the franchise to play the original Peter Weyland, though whilst his acting is good, his character is flawed. The rest of the cast are pretty interchangeable and bear little significance to the plot. They’re there to provide more death variations essentially.
There are some good points. The Aliens look great. Dare I say it, better than ever. They look and move really well. The Predators also look really good. Sadly, not much else does. Some of the CGI looks a bit ropey still. And for a combination of one all out horror franchise and one that is a blend of horror and action, there is very little horror in this film. There’s no scares, very little tension and nothing all that new to the franchises. It’s just a cash grab on two successful franchises. And not a good one either.
JACK’S SCORE: 2/5
Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)
Oh, you thought the first one was bad? Introducing the sequel! Where the whole film is set at night and you can’t actually see anything that’s going on at all. There’s the wonderfully (awful) named Predalien, which is actually an interesting concept, albeit one that seems like a child has come up with. The characters are so one dimensional this time around that I almost wish they weren’t even in the film. It’s good to see an actual competent Predator this time around, and he kills a lot of aliens. I just wish we could see some of it. Seriously, this film is so dark and grim that it is almost impossible to make anything out except for the occasional flash of light. Add to that some pretty choppy editing and you get one big mess of a film you can’t even watch. Who did the colour on this film?! Nobody apparently. There is no colour.
I’m struggling to try and think of anything good to say about this film other than that the already established Predator and Aliens are kind of good. But this film can take no credit for that whatsoever. The characters are very generic, the plot is obvious, there are no scares. There’s not even that much gore shown really. I honestly don’t know what this film aimed to achieve other than having a Predator fight some Aliens again. There’s nothing good, nothing redeeming, nothing to talk about with these two films. It’s no surprise they’ve essentially been wiped out of the canon of the Alien franchise. This is not a good example of a crossover film, nor a film at all really.
JACKS’S SCORE: 1/5